Here's the story of the Chicken and the Pig from Wikipedia if you haven't heard the story.There are several variants as to how the Chicken and the Pig meet and the level of the relationship between the two. However, in every variant, the Chicken suggests that the two involve themselves in a scheme involving making bacon and eggs for breakfast. In reply, the Pig always notes that, for the Chicken, only a contribution is required (as a chicken can simply lay an egg and then resume normal activities), while for the Pig a "total commitment" (or total sacrifice) is needed (as in order to make bacon, the pig must be slaughtered).
Today, I was chatting with my friend CRT and she remarked "you know you are a commit-a-phobe." She suggested that I add to my '30 before 30' list: "Commit to something that involves someone other than yourself." Ouch. Truth hurts. And that's when I replied, "yep, I am a chicken." And on the literal and the figurative level, it's true. If I am totally honest with myself, I am afraid to fully commit to someone or even something, say as simple as a job. With total commitment and sacrifice and the possibility of rejection, disappointment, disillusionment, hurt, betrayal, disloyalty, and a host of other negative results. The more optimistic side of me knows that freedom, love, loyalty, companionship, trust, and so many other things can happen as well. But to be truthful, I've by far experienced more of the negative in relationship with others and I've only allowed myself to be 'involved'.....although I would argue that my involvement can be more than most so-called-commitment. But be that as it may...
Today, I was chatting with my friend CRT and she remarked "you know you are a commit-a-phobe." She suggested that I add to my '30 before 30' list: "Commit to something that involves someone other than yourself." Ouch. Truth hurts. And that's when I replied, "yep, I am a chicken." And on the literal and the figurative level, it's true. If I am totally honest with myself, I am afraid to fully commit to someone or even something, say as simple as a job. With total commitment and sacrifice and the possibility of rejection, disappointment, disillusionment, hurt, betrayal, disloyalty, and a host of other negative results. The more optimistic side of me knows that freedom, love, loyalty, companionship, trust, and so many other things can happen as well. But to be truthful, I've by far experienced more of the negative in relationship with others and I've only allowed myself to be 'involved'.....although I would argue that my involvement can be more than most so-called-commitment. But be that as it may...
So what to do.. what to do...Whelp, for one, I am not adding it to my list although it's a good one. The list is complete (more on that to come!). But I should work on this during the year. I am supposed to be confronting my fears and moving forward with my life. So CRT, thanks for the suggestion. I will work on it. But know that it's going to have to be something that really deserves my total commitment because this year is about ME!
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